Frisky (But Not like that)
by Archemedies
Summary: A variety of one shots, some sweet, some sour, centered around Frisk and Chara, and all the other characters of Undertale. If you have an idea for a one shot, make sure to drop it in the reviews, and I'll get on that as soon as possible.
1. Habromania

**A/N: Hey there guys and gals, Archemedies here with the first one shot of whatever this is. I honestly don't even know. I do however, know that this massive gap in my writing was basically a giant "fuck you" to all you guys and gals who actually spend their own, valuable time to read my shit. So...Yeah. Sorry about that. I had a bunch of family stuff to deal with, and it needed my attention more than this. So...Yeah. This is the first thing I've written in a long time, and it isn't what I said it was going to be. But to be honest, at least it's something. I know it's short, but it's an idea that's been knocking in my head for a while. And this little series of oneshots thing, with undertale and that, will be my main project for now. Just me coming up with random one-shots and knocking them out, some fluffy, some serious. And this is the first chapter of that. If you have ideas for oneshots, drop a review and I'll get on them as quickly as posssible.**

 **Anyways guys and gals, make sure to follow and favorite if you want to see more, and if you feel like it, drop a review along with any ideas you might have. Oh, and spoilers for the genocide route, but not really because it's an AU. And this is somewhat based off a fan made fight between Chara and Papyrus on a genocide route I saw, so it's not entirely mine. Anyway, I've waffled on long enough. Read, enjoy, and as always:**

 **Stay Jammy.**

Habromania.

"...Insanity featuring cheerful delusions"

In the shadows of the hall of judgment, stood Chara.

She'd come a long way to get here, it was true. A long, arduous journey, full of death and and hatred. But soon, it would all be worth it. For past this hall lay her motivation for this insane quest. The king. And past him, lay the button that would put an end to all this. This whole world would fall before her. And only one thing lay between her and that end, the conclusion she rightly deserved.

And his name was Papyrus.

She stepped forward. Light pierced the great, stained glass windows, shining down atop her. She still wore her striped shirt and trousers, but they were stained with the white dust of dozens of monsters. That same dust caked her hands, and dulled the knife she clasped. Her unkempt, dark hair hung long, framing pale, piercing eyes. As she stepped into the light, she heard Papyrus sigh.

"So human...You really are set on doing this"

She gave him a crooked smile.

"Course I am. Why on earth would you think otherwise?"

Papyrus looked up at her. He was sitting, cross legged on the floor. A half eaten plate of spaghetti lay in front of him, and he clutched a knife and frok in his hands.

"I thought...I though you were good. I thought...We were all good. I though if I tried hard enough, I could change the world. I thought..."

"You thought? Oh dear. That sounds terrible. Tell me, what changed your mind?"

His head hung low, and leaned forward.

"Oh...Do you even remember? What you did?"

He dropped the cutlery on the plate and put his head in his hands.

She cocked her head.

"Hmm. I've done a lot in my time...You'll have to be more specific. Murder? Theft? Treason? Give me something to work with here"

"Oh...You don't even care, do you? Snowdin...Sans..."

"Sans?...Oh, the comedian! Oh, he was fun...Until he died"

She thought back to Snowdin, and the skeleton brother of papyrus...He'd been powerful, sure. A deadly adversary, and the only person so far who'd caught onto her true nature. He was...Disturbing. It had taken a long time, and a lot of resets, but she'd eventually beat him, and left him to bleed out, slumped against his sentry station on the edge of snowdin forest. He was the only one who'd managed to even delay her. Other than Undyne...But she preferred not to think about that.

Papyrus stood, and Chara noticed something strange. The flamboyant skeleton was still wearing that ridiculous "Battle body" of his, a white chestpiece, blue shorts, red gloves, and a long red scarve, blowing in a non-existant wind. But now, atop all of it, he wore a tattered blue parka, stretched across his shoulders, hood down.

"Please...I don't want to do this. Just...Lay down your weapon. This can't go on. You can change if you want to. Please"

He picked his pasta of the floor, and held it up to her.

"Just...Don't do this..."

Chara's smiled faded.

He still wanted to help her? She'd...Murdered his brother, and he didn't even want to fight?

"Wow... ! Haha, you know what, I might just have to take you up on that..."

She strode towards him, grin returning. Her eyes blazed bright for a second, as she reached out. Papyrus caught his breath for a second. But then he saw the hand she'd kept behind her back.

Suddenly, he wasn't there anymore, and her blade passed through empty air.

The spaghetti fell to the ground, and the plate shattered loudly, as she lowered her knife. Papyrus regarded her calmly from the back of the hall.

"I guess this is it...Huh. Papyrus, small town nobody, royal guard rejectee...The only thing standing between you, and our King..."

He summoned a staff of bone to his hand, and twirled it, as his left eye burst into yellow light.

"I'm sure Sans would have found this...Pretty humerous, huh?"

"..."

PAPYRUS NO LONGER BELIEVES IN YOU.


	2. Burgerpants' Coffee Shop

**A/N: Hey there guys and gals, Archemedies here with the second chapter one shot thing. This one was a little more upbeat then the previous one, so that's something good. Thank you to the guest who suggested this, I hope I captured most of what you were thinking with this. Yeah. Don't have much to say with this A/N, so, if you want, favorite, follow, and review. Especially make sure to drop a review if you have an idea for a oneshot, and would like to see it happen. Just drop it in the reviews, and I'll get on it as soon as possible. Read, enjoy, and as always: Stay Jammy.**

Burgerpants and his "Coffee Shop"

"Megalize larijuana! Wait, shit"

-A friend of mine.

Frisk pushed open her door, and stepped out into the street, taking a great lungful of morning air.

"Toriel! Sans! Papyrus! I'm going to talk a walk around town! I'll be back by Dinner!"

"See ya kid!"

"Be safe!"

"I'm making spaghetti!"

She gave a chuckle, shut the door, and started walking. She didn't really have anywhere in mind, she just wanted to get out and about. It was only a short trek to the town center, and she made good time. Fairly soon, she was there, standing in the middle of several branching roads, people and monsters going past, many waving hello as they went. She waved back to them, grinning. She turned around, just in time to come face to face with someone she remembered.

"Burgerpants?"

"Wahh!"

He staggered backwards, before doubling over and clutching his chest.

"Oh god...Heart palpitations..."

"Hello!"

He stood up straight, still breathing heavily.

"Oh, it's you...Hey kid..."

"Hey! I haven't seen you in ages! How are you doing!"

He smiled slightly.

"Well, I'm better then before. I don't think I could possibly be worse. Got a new job working at a coffee shop"

"Oh, cool!"

Burgerpants stood awkwardly, looking from right to left. He wasn't used to people talking to him. Especially not with massive grins plastered across their faces.

"So..."

"So?"

"Bye?"

"Bye?"

Burgerpants was sweating profusley.

"Why is everything a question?"

"Is it?"

"It is?"

She grinned at him.

"Are you sure?"

"Nyahhh!"

He collapsed, sitting down hard. Frisk's face fell, worried she'd taken it too far.

"Woah, Burgerpants, are you OK?"

"No..."

"Aw, c'mon, what's wrong? You can tell me..."

"I just...Talking! People! It's difficult...And stressful!"

He looked up, expecting her to be giving him that exasperated look he got so often. Instead, she frowned for a few seconds, before a tiny smile appeared.

"You know what you need Burgerpants?"

"What?"

"You need...To relax! And I'm going to help! C'mon!"

"I...What?"

"Where were you going?"

"Back to my apartment..."

"I'll come with you then! We'll just sit in your apartment, and talk, and _chillll_ " She greatly exaggerated that last word, drawing it out with a wave of her arms.

"I...Guess that would be cool...Yeah, that would be great!"

"Awesome! Let's go!"

She pulled Burgerpants up off the floor, and they strolled off towards his apartment.

Meanwhile, Toriel was doing what she did best.

Worry.

"You know, it's getting awfully close to dinner time. Are you sure she'll be alright out there? It is the big city..."

Sans, on the other hand, was doing his best to comfort her.

"In case you have realized, we live in the "Big city", so that point's kind of invalid. She'll be fine Toriel. She's a big girl"

"Hmm..."

"Tell you what Toriel. If she's not back in the next half hour or so, I'll give her a call, tell her to hurry it up. Then I'll go find her. Ok?"

She frowned.

"Alright"

Little did she know the object of her worries was currently bouncing around in Burgerpants apartment.

"Wow! You have your own house!"

He smiled awkwardly.

"Not really. It's just a couple of rooms"

"It's still cool though!"

She was currently standing in his living room, just a small room with a sofa, a glass coffee table in front of it, and a T.V opposite that. It wasn't much, but it was still impressive that he'd managed it on minimum wage.

"Yeah...It is pretty cool"

Frisk headed across, and plonked herself down on the sofa, swinging her legs.

"So! What are we going to do!"

"Huh?"

"To chill!"

Burgerpants crossed his arms and frowned, thinking hard.

"I don't know..."

Frisk frowned too.

"Well. What do you normally do to "chill"?"

"Oh. When I want to chill...Hold on a second"

He hurried out of the living room, into the small kitchen. Frisk sat quietly for a few seconds, before Burgerpants rushed back in.

"Here we go!"

In his hands was a long, white paper tube, like she'd seen some of the humans smoking. This one smelt funny though.

"Huh? What's that for?"

"To chill"

Without any hesitation, he tucked it into his mouth, and lit it with a lighter that seemed to materialize in his hands. The smell grew far stronger.

"Woah!"

He took a great drag on it, and blew out the smoke.

"Woah indeed"

Frisk could see the immediate change. His posture changed, instead of standing upright, he seemed to slump slightly, his breathing deepened, and his eyes unfocused. He dropped onto the sofa next to her, and took a second pull.

"Ah. That's the stuff..."

Frisk couldn't help but stare. He seemed to misinterpret this though.

"Oh, sorry. You want twos?"

He held it out to her. She was a little apprehensive, but after seeing what it did for Burgerpants, she was a little curious. She took it from him, and following what she'd seen him do, she took a puff of it.

Only to cough loudly near instantly.

"Don't worry about that...Happens to everyone"

With that encouragement, she took another bun. And another one. And another. And they passed it back and forth until her phone rang.

Sans was beginning to get annoyed. Not because he'd had to phone her up, but because now he'd probably have to go get her. And that was far more effort then he'd like.

It rang several times before she picked up.

"Heeey Sans!"

Hmm...Weird. Her voice was all off, a little higher pitched then normal.

"Hey kid. You planning on coming back anytime soon?"

"What? Sansy, what are you talking about? I don't have to be home 'till dinner!" She giggled oddly.

"And dinners soon. You need to start heading home. If you want, I can come pick you up?" He didn't like this...She was acting weird.

"What? You? Come here? That'd be great! Hey Burgerpants, what's your address?"

"Huh...That's funny"

"What is?"

"I can't remember!"

Sans jerked back from the phone as they burst into crackling laughter, as if they'd just heard the joke to end all jokes.

"You're at Burgerpants' place?"

"Yeah..."

"Alright, I know where that is"

"Cool! See ya!"

He hung up. This wasn't good. He'd heard a little about Burgerpants. And he had a sneaking suspicion about what was wrong with Frisk.

"Hey Papyrus!"

"Yes?"

"Can you come with me? I'm gonna get Frisk"

"Oh? Are you sure you need me to come with you? The dinners just gone in the oven-"

"Yeah, I'm sure. Toriel can watch the food"

"Hmm. Ok then Sans. It'll take us a little to get there though"

"No it won't. I know a shortcut"

Frisk was a giggling mess on the sofa by that point. Burgerpants was far more mellow, but he still wasn't quite himself. They both slumped upright when the doorbell rang.

"Woah. Kid, can you get that? I would, but..."

"Say no more!"

She staggered off the sofa, and over to the door. She managed to grab the handle after few misses, and yanked open the door.

"Oh! Hey Sans! Oh, you brought Papyrus too...Cool!"

Sans looked down at her, and narrowed his eyes. It was as he feared.

Burgerpants leaned in to check the door, and was shocked to find Sans standing there, with Papyrus behind him.

"Oh...Hello?"

Frisk looked up, startled.

"Woah...Sans...Why's your eye on fire? Why's it blue...?"

"Papyrus. Take the kid home"

Sans' eye was indeed, glowing blue. Papyrus frowned. He'd only seen Sans like this on very few occasions. And they never turned out well. He grabbed Frisk by the hand, and pulled her to his side.

"Erm...Sans? What are you going to do...? Brother?"

"Oh, don't worry about us. Me and Burgerpants here, are just gonna have a little talk. You take Frisk home, give her some time to recover. We're just gonna talk. Aren't we Burgerpants?"

Sans strode in through the door, and as it closed behind him, Papyrus could have he heard a small voice mutter:

"So...You want to have a bad time..."

He shook his head, and looked down at Frisk, who was swaying back and forth.

"Well, time to head home...I just hope Sans doesn't do anything too dramatic..."

...

 ***Megalovania Intensifies***


	3. What must be done

**A/N: This one's a little more serious, but it's an idea I've had for a while. Like, what if they left the underground, and came face to face with a firing squad. I'm a morbid person.**

 **Anyway, m being weird and sad is basicly all I had, so yeah. Fav, follow, and review if you want. Especially make sure to review if you have an idea for a one shot you want doing. Drop it in the reviews and I'll get on it as soon as possible. Stay jammy.**

What must be done.

Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.

-Friedrich Nietzsche

"Oh God...Please..."

Sans looked down at the soldier, lying on his back in a pool of his own blood. There was a final gurgle, and he fell silent.

He shook his head and turned, striding away from the overturned APC. The armoured vehicle had been thrown across the street, crashing into the side of a house. The rest of the roadblock was in similar shape, vehicles crushed and burning, bodies scattered across the ground, not all of them in one piece. He smiled grimly. It felt good to get back at them like this.

He blinked, and he was standing atop a block of flats, looking down at a city tearing at the seams. Sporadic gunfire filled the air, and great palls of smoke climbed high into the air, streaming from the many burning buildings. He looked down, counting the seconds.

One...

Two...

Three...

Undyne flew out of the sky, clad in her armour, and slammed down next to him.

"Heya"

"Hey..."

They stood in silence for a few seconds, before he looked up at her.

"How's the advance going?"

She sighed, and pulled off her helmet.

"It's looking good" Her voice was heavy. "We're rolling them back, but we're taking casualties. They're...Acceptable. I trust you've dealt with that checkpoint?"

He thought back, to billowing explosions and impaled corpses.

"Yeah"

She nodded her head, and turned to him. She was different, and she looked it. Her once spotless armour was stained with soot and blood, marked by the scratches of glancing blows and the deep gouges of straight shots. A long scar ran across her neck, a livid white against the deep blue of her skin. A souvenir of a close range knife fight with a human commander.

"Right. Alphys called earlier"

Sans smiled.

"Really? Is she OK?"

"Yeah...You know she doesn't like this. But she knows it has to be done"

"You two still...?"

She grinned.

"Yeah. Moment I come off the front, I'm going back. Already got a ring and everything. And I'm calling you as best man"

"Wouldn't have it any other way."

They stood together, in a comfortable silence. They stayed like that for a while. Until Undyne's phone rang.

"Hold on...Hey Alphys? You OK? Great...What? Damn it...Guess I'm going to have to stay out here for little while longer...I'm so sorry. You shouldn't have to deal with this...I'm sorry. I'll talk to you soon, OK? Love you!"

She hung up, and slipped her phone into a slot in her armor.

"Alphys just called. Intel shows there's an armoured division heading this way. Helicopters, Jeeps, APCs, and even a few tanks. And they're heading right past this building"

Sans smiled and turned. Even now, he could see the choppers on the horizon, hear the rotors thumping. Wait, he shouldn't be able to hear them yet...

He felt a great pressure on his back, and turned to find Undyne staring down a helicopter. It was hovering just in front of the building, blowing up grit and small stones. It was a t-shaped craft with three rotors, a heavy gun mounted to it's belly, painted in white and red. The pilot stared out of the cockpit at them, and even from here he could see the fear in his eyes. The megaphone attached to the nose blared to life.

"S-s-surrender! We have you out-manned and out-gunned! Surrender!"

Sans simply tilted his head.

"Didn't you hear me! Hands in the air!"

And suddenly, Sans wasn't there anymore. He was back in the mouth of the cave, just past the barrier, and all the monsters in the underground where there with him. Papyrus, Toriel, Undyne, Alphys and Asgore. And beside him...

Frisk.

"Wow kid. You really did it. You...You did it"

She looked up at him, beaming.

"Told you I would. I told you..."

She looked back at all the assembled monsters, staring at her with undisguised admiration, and he knew she was just as surprised as he was.

She was just doing a better job of hiding it.

"Well kid? Anything you want to say to our assembled compatriots?"

Her face went blank for a second as she took them all in. But then, she took a deep breath.

"People! Monsters! This...Is it! We're free! And you can all return to the surface!"

They screamed and howled so loud it shook the cavern.

Suddenly, Undyne hurtled back into the cave.

"Hey! Dork! There's a group of humans heading up the mountain! There in a weird caterpiller looking thing. Dunno what it is though"

Alphys scratched her head for second.

"Huh. They must have had sensors in place to monitor the barrier. Only way they'd respond so quickly"

Frisk grinned even wider.

"Alright! I'll go meet them! We need to tell them what happened!"

"And I, the great Papyrus, will go with you!"

"Yeah!"

And then they were hurtling out, gone from the cave in seconds.

Sans smiled at seeing his brother so enthusiastic.

"Welp, I'll head done too. They need some kind of level headed speaker, so the humans don't decide we're all crazy. Hell, for all I now, they could still have..."

"A bone to pick with us!"

Sans turned as the assembled monsters erupted into laughter, and sauntered off into the shadows at the edge of the cave.

And then, he was a quarter of the way down the mountain, watching Papyrus slip and slide their way down. and coming up the path to meet them, was a strange vehicle. Undyne was right, it did look like a caterpiller. A great armoured caterpiller.

Frisk and Papyrus stopped, and the...Car? Turned, and stopped, side on to them. The side hatched open, and a group of humans filed out. And that was Sans began to worry. Each one was dressed in hooded red overalls, a strange, nozzled mask covering their faces, and strange plastic devices cradled in their hands. The last man stepped out. This one wore no mask, but instead bore a red hat, marked with a badge of some kind. As he began to talk, it became evident he was their leader.

"Fall in!"

The others formed up into a line, their devices pointed at Frisk and Papyrus.

"Raise your hands!"

He saw Frisk falter.

"What?"

"You heard me! Hands in the air!" He raised his own weapon, a smaller version he held in one hand. "How'd you break the barrier! Monsters can't pass it!"

Frisk smiled, and took a step forward.

"Yeah, about that...It's gone. But, I'm human! And the monsters aren't that bad! They're pretty cool!"

The commander's face went ashen.

"They're out? Oh god..."

The other soldiers started fidgeting, looking from side to side as if they were expecting to be set upon at any moment.

Papyrus stepped forward.

"Well humans, I can safely say that monsters are indeed, cool! And if you'd like some spaghetti-"

"Shut it! Shut up!" He waved the gun back and forth. "Not one more step forward! Not one step! You hear me!"

Frisk shook her head, and made to move.

"Look, I'm human, see? Just a kid? Don't worry-"

"STOP! I swear to God! One! More! Step! And Christ as my witness, I will shoot you dead!"

Frisk smiled.

Sans had watched this all, but he knew what she was going to do. He couldn't let this happen.

He teleported in next to the commander.

"Listen man-"

He turned, saw Sans, and his eyes widened.

And then, there was a sound, like a firecracker, but far louder. There was a great gasp, and he turned to see Frisk pitching backward Papyrus rushing to catch her as the soldiers sprinted back into their vehicle. He ran to her, and knelt down. She was on her side, curled up, and Papyrus was trying to get her to turn, so he could check her. She went limp, and they turned her over.

"Kid! Frisk!"

Know, she was on her back. There was a spreading red stain on her sweater, coming from the small hole in her side, just below the right side of her ribs.

"Oh no..."

He shifted, and the ground squelched under his knees.

"Frisk?"

"Sans...?"

Her eyes were heavy.

"Frisk, kid! Stay with me..."

"Well, that's bad..."

She reached her hand into the sky, as if pushing a button only she could see.

"What? Kid, what are-"

"It's not working...I can't load..."

"Frisk, you're scaring me..."

She smiled sadly.

"I guess I used it all up in that final battle...This is it...The end..."

"Frisk!"

Her smile faded, and her eyes closed.

"Game over man...Game over"

"Frisk! Don't you dare...Frisk...Frisk..."

"Brother...Is the human...?"

He leaned over her for a second, before he looked up at Papyrus.

"Yes. She is..."

"Oh no..."

And before Papyrus could say anything, Sans stood.

And he was gone.

In the APC, the soldiers were arguing.

"They're out?"

"Are they really bad?"

"The monsters? Yeah. The worst"

"I killed a kid..."

"Sir!"

The driver interrupted them.

"That...Skeleton things in front of us, it's in the road!"

"Run it down"

"But...It's eye..."

Sans stared down the approaching vehicle. His eye gleamed blue, and vapour curled from it.

"It's...Staring"

He swiped his hand, and the APC went tumbling off the road. It flipped and twirled, before coming to a broken stop, somehow on its tires, dented and smoking.

He was beside it.

The driver was slumped against the steering wheel, head at an odd angle to the rest of his body, and most of the soldiers were lying still in the personnel compartment. Only the commander draged himself out of the hole where the door used to be. He was bleeding from he head, and one leg trailed uselessly.

"Oh God..."

"God can't help you now"

Sans looked down at him, eyes black, as a Gaster Blaster floated into position by his right shoulder.

"You..."

"Me..."

"I'm...Sorry. I didn't mean to. I didn't! I'm sorry, I'm so sorry..."

Sans gave a hollow laugh.

"You don't get to be sorry"

He turned and walked away, as the blaster fired, the APC becoming a great fireball behind him. He walked away...

Right back into the present.

"Just surrender! Then we can have peace!"

He faced off with the helicopter, as a blaster came to his call, formed in a blaze of fire. And another. And another. And yet more.

"You had your chance for peace. Her name was Frisk. And you gunned her down in cold blood. Peace isn't an option"

As the blasters burst to life, the chopper melting, and crashing out the sky, Undyne leaping down to engage the APC's, he had but one thought in his mind.

I'm so sorry it had to end like this.

But some things must be done.


End file.
